"All humans seek the illusive touch of another's Soul, which opens us to the sense of belonging to something bigger than the self. Dr. Kortsch has given us the true "tao" of relationship in this brilliant exploration of emotional tapestry. We will be grateful for this illumination of spiritual partnership for generations to come." Chris Griscom, Spiritual Leader, Author

"Eloquent and comprehensive, showing how your primary love relationship may be a sacred vessel that transports you and your partner to a place of mutual healing and expansion." Robert Schwartz, Author: Your Soul's Gift: The Healing Power of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born

"The Tao of Spiritual Partnership is a unique blend of wit and wisdom; Dr. Kortsch encourages us to take responsibility for our relationships, while recognizing and seizing the opportunities for our own personal spiritual growth." William Buhlman, Author of Adventures Beyond the Body

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

What You Have Is NOW

Here's what we sound like when we're talking about the future:
  • I can't wait until we go on vacation

  • I'll be so relieved when I lose these last 10 pounds

  • Everything will be perfect when we move into the new house

  • Things will be so much better when I find a new job

  • My relationship will be fantastic as soon as my partner changes
And here's what we sound like when we're talking about the past:
  • I wish I could just have my last vacation again

  • I looked so fantastic and slim when I was 18

  • The house we had when we lived in ___ was so perfect

  • My first job was just incredible

  • When I first met my partner our relationship was so wonderful
So when do we live in the present? All we have is now. Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow hasn't come yet, but we insist on filling most of our present moments with wishful thoughts of the future (when things will be better), or nostalgic thoughts of the past (when things were better).
Yet what we could really be concentrating on is making our present moments better. By not doing this, we could equate ourselves to the overweight person who moans about the weight, wishes it would be gone, remembers when it was less, but never does anything in the present moment to improve the situation. If our present moment is not as wonderful as it might be, one thing to do, therefore, is to change some of the things that are not so good in this present moment.
But be careful: that kind of thinking may also take you into future mode, where all you do is spend time on how wonderful things will be when you accomplish this or that.
Therefore, in order to improve the present moment, things must be done in the present. For example, being grateful for anything at all in your present moment, as simple and small as it may be (the butterfly that you see, the blue sky, your skills in a specific area - whatever it is, etc.). This action, being grateful, has the capacity to make your present moment better.
Think of your positive points. Dwell, for a moment, on all you have already accomplished, no matter what it may be, in order to see - now in this present moment - all that you have inside of you, and all that you can use (that is already there, and that has served you well in the past) to make this now moment even better, in order that future now moments will be similarily improved.
Remember...you literally throw your life away, if you do not make some of these changes...life is to be lived now, today, and not tomorrow or yesterday.
Treasure each moment.
  • are you taking a walk or working out at the gym? Treasure that

  • are you having your early morning coffee or tea? Treasure that

  • are you driving to work in heavy traffic? Treasure that by listening to something truly enjoyable on your CD or cassette drive or radio (inspirational speakers are my favorite, but you may prefer music, or learning a language that you would normally not have time for, etc.)

  • are you taking your children to a soccer game? Treasure that

  • are your preparing dinner? Treasure that
The trick (if we can call it that) is truly to begin to recognize that each and every moment of our lives offers the opportunity for us to treasure it - if we so decide. That means we must be fully aware of ourselves as well. Choices are hard to make without awareness. And inner freedom is hard to achieve without making choices that are based on a life lived in the now.

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