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Monday, June 4, 2012

Being a Victim or Choosing Freedom

  • It's just the way I am.
  • My husband/boyfriend/partner always makes me so sad.
  • My wife/girlfriend/partner always makes me so mad.
  • When it rains I get so depressed.
  • When they play "our" song on the radio, I feel so nostalgic.
  • When my boss gets stressed he yells at me and I resent him so much for it.
  • They cooked my steak too much, but I don't like to make a fuss, so I had to eat this really tough piece of meat for lunch and now I have indigestion.
  • My friend stood me up for dinner the other day because some guy she really likes asked her out in the last minute. I'm really happy for her, but I don't think it's right she left me high and dry with nothing to do on a Saturday evening.
Sound familiar? Recognize any of these tunes?
So if you have been reading some of the posts on this blog or my other blog Rewiring the Soul, you will have realized that in all of the above situations, no matter what the external event, you can choose to see yourself as a victim of circumstance, or you can choose to see other alternatives of action, thought, or feeling, and in so doing, choose freedom. It is freedom, because you no longer have a blind reaction to the external event, but deliberately choose how to react to a given situation.
Choosing to react from a number of different alternatives means you have a choice about the outcome inside of you, and you always have a choice.

See also the following articles from my website regarding making choicess:


Image: Symbol of Yin Yang. Photo Credit

Also see the chapters on boundaries and choice in my earlier book Rewiring the Soul, available on Amazon in print or Kindle format. Or click here to download the first chapter.
Posted by Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D. at
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